An
elderly man is stopped by the police around 1 a.m. and is asked
where he is
going at this time of night.
The man replies, "I am going to a lecture
about alcohol abuse and the
effects it has on the human body."
The
officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this
time of
night?"
The man replies, "My wife."
From: Mardawna Grover
Subject: Happy Thanksgiving!
Easy TURKEY RECIPE
>
> I thought this sounded good! Here is a turkey recipe that also includes the use of popcorn as a stuffing ingredient -- imagine that. When I found this recipe, I thought it was perfect for people like me, who just are not sure how to tell when turkey is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out.
>
> Give this a try.
>
>>
>
> 8 - 15 lb. turkey
> 1 cup melted butter
> 1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good)
> 1 cup un-popped popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHER'S LOW FAT IS BEST)
> Salt/pepper to taste
>>
>
> Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush turkey well with melted butter, salt,
> and
> pepper.
> Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan making sure the
> neck end is toward the front of the oven, not the back.
>
> *After about 4 hours listen for the popping sounds.*>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> *When the turkey's ass blows the oven door open and the bird flies across
> the room,.... it's done.
>>
>
> And, you thought I didn't cook...*
From: al
You have got to laugh.
A dog lover, whose dog was a bitch and 'in heat', agreed to look after her neighbors' male dog while they were away on vacation.She had a large house and believed that she could keep them apart but as she was drifting off to sleep she heard awful howling and moaning sounds, rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together, in obvious pain and unable to disengage as so frequently happens when they mate.Unable to separate them and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was late she called the vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice.Having explained the problem to him, the vet said"Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs.I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and be able to withdraw"."Do you think that will work?" she asked"It just worked for me" he replied
